Sunday, June 05, 2005

An Open Letter

Dear CBC Radio:

Please understand that I am an unshakably loyal listener. CBC News is my news; As It Happens is the best thing ever to happen to the telephone since the invention of the pushbutton. I have Radio Two on all day Saturday and all day Sunday. Stuart McLean has a permanent place at the breakfast table, as far as I'm concerned. Rick Phillips is similarly welcome any time. My Saturday afternoon isn't complete without Saturday Afternoon at the Opera. So I say this in the most loving and constructive manner possible: Stop it already with the Songs of the Auvergne.

Today was the last straw. If you play the G-D Songs of the Ferkakte Auvergne one more time, I'm going to pitch a hissy the like of which has never been seen. What is it, like eight times in the past year alone? Get a grip. I mean, I love Karina Gauvin, too - she's aces. But enough is enough! I've heard the things so much I could sing them myself. Honestly, I'm dreaming in Auvergnais now. I can't take one more airing; take them out of the rotation or somebody at the shiny new broadcast centre on Sparks Street is in for the frowning of a lifetime. I'm talking foot-stamping, peel-the-paint-off-the-plaster, full-bore tanty. With bad words, even.

Seriously: quit it.

Much less love than usual,

Sandman

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